My midwife took one look at my yellow card and threw back her corn rows as she laughed in that big, open hearty way that African women have. Her tiny student midwife looked at me sympathetically as I rolled my eyes, shook my head and ended up laughing too.
"38, 38, 38 and now this!" My midwife exclaimed, still laughing.
"We were not expecting this at all!" My mum joined my spectator list and all three of them looked at me in amusement.
It probably isn't funny but when you've gone so far overdue when you've had all your other children at exactly 38 weeks and 2 days, there is nothing else left to do but see the bright side.
I'm 41 weeks today as it is Wednesday. Most women are given the date 40 weeks from their LMP as their due date but anywhere between 37 and 42 weeks is considered a normal delivery. My midwife advised that we shouldn't wait until 42 weeks so inshallah this Friday has been allocated as my induction date.
It has definately been long journey and has not been easy. I have had severe symphisis pubis dysfunction or pelvic girldle pain. It is a pain that shoots through the joints when the pelvic bones meet the back, with horrible clicking, cracking sounds. Its makes simple tasks such as walking, sitting, laying very difficult. Alhamdulilah, I'm grateful that this is the only issue I've had. This is one of the most important lessons I have learnt this pregnancy. Gratefulness to Allah subhana hua taala.
I am happy that Allah taught me a tremendous lesson through my going overdue. One of them was that life isn't a game of chance. Everything is predestined and destined by the Almighty - not in anything else. Just because our bodies, our genes or medical history cause our births to go a certain way it doesn't necessarily mean that Allah will conduct things the same way next time.
It has been enjoyable being the butt of many jokes by the midwives, family and friends (all of whom are so lovely that I travelled a 7 hour drive down to Sydney just to be with them during this birth) as to why this baby isn't coming. As funny as it all is, I have realised is quite risky for our iman when we are surrounded by non-muslim or secular opinions on qadr. Its so to nod our heads or affirm a joke that may in fact be shirk in disguise. For instance all my midwives expected this baby to arrive in Mid April, it is not Mid May and Allah has shown everyone who will decide when the baby will be born.
Allah knows what every female carries and what the wombs suck in and get bigger. And everything with Him is by due measure. Surah Rad Verse 8
Subhanallah we don't know anything. We can not predict anything. No amount of expert gynaecological technique or technology can bring forward this baby. Neither can any "home remedy" bring on labour without the explicit permission of Allah.
The Knower of the Unseen and the Seen, the Great, the Possessor of the Greatest Heights. Surah Rad Verse 9
Since the end of April almost all my family and friends have called, every few days to see whether my little blessing has arrived. Subhanallah I am overwhelmed by the care, the concern and the love. And this has been the most humbling pregnancy to date. I have been messaged, called, visited and food parcelled with so much love this pregnancy that it should wipe away any feelings of difficulty, any pangs of pain and struggle that pregnancy brings. My mother and sisters have been the greatest support, taking me into their home at the beginning of the school year to help me with settling my BabyGirl1 into kindergarten. My spd condition meant that they put alot of sweat into helping me with BabyBoy1 and BabyGirl2 with all the mess and stress that toddlers make.
My love and appreciation for my dear husband has also alhamdulilah increased. Every week for the past few weeks i've been getting fake contractions and everytime he is ready to drive down his 6 hour drive in order to be by my side during labour. I am making dua that Allah allows us to be together during labour since he is the one who reminds me to make dhikr, to remember Allah and ofcourse who is the one who gets his hand painfully crushed :)
I feel so much love and gratefulness to Allah for giving me so much. I ask him to give abundance to everyone who helped me through smiles, through strains or hot biryani, for everyone who made dua for me through their own labours, hajjs, griefs and trials, for everyone who even gave me the slightest thought. May Allah relieve each and everyone of them from any distress regardless of how trivial they think it is and to reward them in ways that will please them. Ameen.
(A still pregnant) Umm Musk :)
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